Abuse of a spouse often happens over time, and in a variety of ways, including emotional or verbal abuse. Choosing to divorce an emotionally or verbally abusive husband or wife is a courageous step towards reclaiming your life. Following a few steps, such as getting a Court order of protection or “OP”, is typically essential. Keeping other practices in mind, as listed below, can also help make this process easier, whether you’re dealing with an abusive wife or an abusive husband.
Start with a Safety Plan
Your safety is critical when leaving an emotionally or verbally abusive spouse. Creating a safety plan involves:
- Identifying safe places
- Knowing the quickest escape route from your home
- Having an emergency contact list
Your plan should be kept confidential, but accessible, in times of urgent need. Consider placing a packed bag with essential items in a secure location.
Secure Your Support System
Having a reliable support system can make a substantial difference when dealing with verbal abuse in a marriage. A close friend or family member can often provide emotional and practical support. Their assistance may be invaluable, especially when dealing with the complexities of emotional abuse in marriage. Encourage regular check-ins with your support network and consider setting up code words for discreet help requests.
Reach Out for Resources
There are several resources available to those experiencing domestic abuse. Look for local shelters, legal aid services, and counseling centers that may be willing to help. These organizations can typically provide guidance on how to protect yourself during a divorce as well as provide information on the steps you need to take next. Community-based programs can commonly provide additional support as well.
Domestic Violence Support Groups
Support groups for domestic violence survivors are typically a lifeline for many. These groups provide a safe space to share your experiences, such as dealing with mental or physical abuse in a marriage. Regular participation can significantly boost your morale and strengthen your resolve to continue to move forward. Contacting and securing a lawyer who is well versed in domestic violence is also recommended to help you prepare for the future.
Establish Legal Protection
Legal protection is critical during a separation from an emotionally abusive spouse. These laws typically vary by location, so it’s essential to understand your rights and the types of orders available in your area, such as restraining and emergency protective orders. Understanding how a protective order works is important as well.
Restraining Orders and Emergency Protective Orders (aka an “OP” or Order of Protection)
Obtaining a ‘restraining order’, an ‘order of protection’, or an ‘emergency protective order’ can often be vital in protecting you from further harm. These orders legally state that the abuser is to stay away from the protected person(s) as well as anywhere they frequent, such as their workplace, and often restrict the abuser from contacting you at all.
Documentation of all encounters with the abuser can be instrumental in securing these orders. A domestic violence lawyer can help streamline this process if you need a protection restraining order.
How to File an Order of Protection
You will usually need to contact your local courthouse to file a protective order aka an order of protection or OP. The courthouse staff will commonly guide you through the process, which typically involves completing paperwork and providing evidence of abuse. Knowing how to prove emotional abuse in court is crucial during this stage. Be sure that all communications and incidents are well-documented.
Work with a Domestic Violence Divorce Lawyer
Seeking the expertise of a domestic violence divorce lawyer is highly recommended. A domestic violence lawyer specializes in handling cases involving abuse of a spouse. These lawyers will help guide you through the legal complexities of this type of divorce. You can do a simple online search for “domestic violence lawyer near me” to connect with professionals in your area.
Final Thoughts on Emotional Abuse in a Marriage
Leaving an emotionally abusive marriage is a big decision, but it’s a decisive step towards rebuilding your life. Know that you are not alone in this circumstance, and with the right plan and support, you can transition to a safer and happier future. Always prioritize your safety and contact professionals who can support and properly guide you during this challenging time. Each step forward allows you to move closer to a new chapter of freedom and peace.
